About a head-stand too intense April 2 - 8, 2001 ... and everything that lead to it, and from it.

After a miserable diving weekend, naturally, I got a miserable cold. It complicated my life, since I promised to watch Kren's house, as it got filled with working crews -- besides remodeling a fireplace in Monterey, Krens decided to put new windows on their Los Altos home, while they would be off to Japan during Madeleine's Spring break week. That assumed their passports not being expired, and Madeleine's was; so the plan was that Martina with Madeleine would go to San Francisco for a new one (Madeleine is thirteen and has to apply in person), while I was to prevent Smudla from tearing the more frightened one of two Borises to pieces.

	Welcome Monterey Bay

Borises were two Mongolian workers who put in the new windows. One was completely easy about Smudla, but the other one was the best victim Smudla ever met in his life -- finally someone who would seriously believe all the growling and being "awfully bad and mean spirited, though serious and responsible dog"!!! And so I spent my Tuesday and Thursday hanging out at Kren's, drinking coffee, browsing through their bookcases, answering George's phone inquiries "how far did they get?". Whenever I heard barking that would freeze all your blood in your veins, I got up and detached the doggie from the bottoms of Boris's overalls.

It must have improved my health, as I felt so fit on Friday that I joined Sid in renting wetsuits, BCDs, and tanks at Randy's. With a key to Kren's apartment on a large chain, we took off for Monterey, while Krens themselves (including Madeleine with her brand new passport) dozed off somewhere over Pacific.

A wonderful sunshine settled over Monterey Bay on Saturday, and waves were dotted by white foamy crests. It made us want to go for a walk on the beach. What a mistake. I think it is quite interesting that above certain wind speed, sand behaves like snow. Besides walking past strangely compacted dunes blown all over some coastal roads, we also experienced tiny particles hitting our faces, and little heaps of sand formed around us wherever we shook our clothes. Watching the ocean closer, we sadly departed from the idea of scuba diving in it. There was no boat on the bay, and daring to enter huge, merciless surf seemed to equal deliberate self-mutilation. Still we set the alarm-clock to catch our appointment at 7:30 a.m. at K-dock.

	Sid about to tip overboard

	We were diving right in tourists' faces - in front of Monterey Aquarium

In the morning, we carefully packed two bags; one with diving stuff, and another with dry clothes and food. Got to the meeting place in last moment. Perry watched us with a quizzed look, expecting us to be already dressed up in suits (we received his e-mail, with instructions to be there at 7:30 in suits, on Sunday night). Everything became clear when we saw the boat. Besides the captain Wings, and his hand / dive master K.C., there was hardly any room left besides the six of us with tanks and fins -- no chance of changing, or moving two big bags on boards.

Everybody helped us to get things together, and we sailed out on the bay. The sun was up, not much wind, but there were still some swells. Our originally intended place had murky waters, end we eventually returned closer to Monterey, right in front of the Aquarium, and started getting ready for our first dip (certainly catching some tourists' attention). Perry and Mike went first, Sid's boss Don with his daughter Mary were the second pair, and I with Sid went last.

Unfortunately, my first ten feet confirmed that my cold did not leave me. I could not equalize pressure in my ears. I got back to surface and tried it gradually (that is, I started equalizing before I felt the pressure, not after, right from the surface). It was somewhat better, but my ears still hurt like hell. Normally it suffices when I swallow and wiggle my jaws, but this time I had to work my nose like everybody else does.

After an eternity we landed in sixty feet depth and ventured along the bottom. The water was full of sand particles after the windy day, but we could see a few fish, anemones, and stars. You can move around in three dimensions while you scuba dive, and to hang with your head down is quite fun.

	Sid surfaced and grins happily

I paid the price for it, though -- it did not take long and my balance got disturbed. No matter what I tried I was ascending, even with a fully evacuated BCD. I did not think it was caused by the tank becoming emptier (I was through about half of my air), but I could not stop it. Fortunately, reverse pressures equalize much easier, or I would go crazy of pain instead.

Having reached the surfaced, I signaled to Wings and K.C. that I was OK, and waited fatalistically for Sid to get up, for I seriously shortened his stay under water. It took him a while, as he ascended - unlike me - by the book, that is, slowly.

Yet right with his first breath he informed me that he had trouble breathing. His mouth was right at the surface, it looked as if the waves were to swallow him any moment. I grabbed his tank (actually behind his head, so that he could get above the surface), and tried to pull him to the boat. Try to pull a hippo!!! I did not dare to inflate his BCD, as I did not know if it was not the cause of his problem. Eventually I waved to K.C. (divemaster, who remained on the boat, ready to help). He surprised me how fast he was with us, and simply dragged Sid away. During the few yards to the boat, he managed to ask me twice, if I was OK, and I reassured him twice that I was.

	It's over....

Perry surfaced at the ladder to the boat and also asked me how I was, and I repeated that my health was good. He was somewhat puzzled and told me that I had "a little flood in the mask", which seemed like a little redundant concern -- there's ALWAYS a tiny amount of salt water in a diver's mask, and the salty, warm feeling about my nose did not seem any special. Until I turned my eyes to my nose, and discovered that Perry did not mean flood, he said blood...

After that I was sitting sadly on the boat and wiped my nose on a bloody napkin. The boys assured me it was nothing serious, I must have torn something in my sinuses, while I tried to equalize my ears. I did not go for the second dive, for I'm no masochist. Perry said he was not going either, and we sent off Sid paired with Mike.

	... guess who got a cold in Monterey this time?

They returned after a good three quarters of an hour, Sid was not having problems this time, on the contrary, he kept shouting out in delight, how they swam in a kelp forest and saw all kinds of fish. I spent the time watching otters and sea lions, and seals, who provoked me to fury by making me pull out my camera and briskly disappearing before I could snap a shot. They returned only after the camera went back to its watertight bag.

In the end, the spirits were high, as we were returning back to the marina. Though it was not quite hot, at least no wind blew and the sun was shining ... simply one of those moments when you say "gosh there must be something to this scuba diving".

We began to move our stuff back from the boat to our car, when I felt a sudden wave of cold sweat. In a flash, it became clear to me why my troubles with buoyance started with this perfect head-stand! I must have looked like a clown who stands on his hands and delivers the contents of his pockets in front of the amused public. Well I delivered the contents of MY BCD pockets -- six pounds of lead -- in front of the Monterey Aquarium, but I doubt that anybody saw me in 60 ft...

Copyright © 2001-2005 by Carol & Sid Paral. All rights reserved.